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Monday, October 21, 2013

On a More Serious Note..

As many of you internet friends know, I love to cook. Cooking for me-like many.. is an art form that allows you to escape the monotonous circles of thoughts, tasks, endless to do lists, whiny kids on your legs, horrible reality tv shows and.. the dreadful news.
True Life: I am a cookbook hoarder.
I am a recipe junkie.

In my endless quest for seeking something to satisfy my next foodie craving, I found something.

I found an essay written before a recipe I wanted to review.. and It touched me in a place that says all of the things I am feeling..yet says it so eloquently and thoughtfully with out any f bombs or seething anger.. (LOL)  .. It says what I think so many of us are feeling in so many ways.. deep down to our core.. but may not have the time, tools or... exact moment of realization to write ourselves..

So with that said.. I offer you this..  and thank you Alice Currah.


The Heart Wants What The Heart Wants: Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Pancakes

by Alice Currah on October 17, 2013
The heart wants what the heart wants.  I’ve been on an ongoing journey of intense reflecting, meditation, and going through the process of trying, like many of you, to figure out what exactly I am meant to do in life.  Much of this all started when my father passed away nearly 3 years ago.  Although I am not grieving the loss anymore, his death was a catalyst in helping me filter the importance of living a life consistent with what I believe and having the courage to continue to walk down this path.
The older I get (will be turning 40 next year) I realize that the optimism and hope I once had for people has eroded into acceptance that not only are people not perfect, they are in fact very broken.  The only saving grace about any of this is knowing my hope, joy, and peace does not directly come from people.  Instead, I rely solely on my faith that convinces me I never walk alone in this journey called life.

Another reality I’ve come to accept is that nothing surprises me anymore.  There are people hurting all around us, atrocities happening, and hearts breaking because we’ve become a collective culture of self perpetuated importance where we make self absorbed decisions with the hope of self gratification at the risk of putting our friends, family, jobs, etc at the alter of consequences which can change the lives of those around us, forever.  And I am not here to judge anyone but rather to point out that we are living in a digital age where we project not only is life good but that it’s great, as we whine our 1st world problems into clever passive aggressive social media status updates fishing for likes. This makes me so very sad.

Boundaries which used to be clearly black and white have become a gazillion shades of grey.**

Just read the news and you will find countless headlines which support my theory that people will make (often) stupid, irrational decisions because the heart wants what the heart wants regardless of all those people who will get bulldozed along the way.

But the good news is each day we have an opportunity to wake up and get off this crazy train and be the good guy.  The one who restores a little bit of sanity in a crazy world, shows a little compassion where hope is needed, and extends open arms of love and grace to those who are in need.  We don’t have to settle for this me-first driven culture.  Instead, we can choose to live outside the box and seek a life beyond a me-first world.

We can make a decision to live courageously today by being intentional in our words, actions, and thoughts.  We can choose to live a life where we value other people beyond our own needs to be satisfied.  And no, I am not talking about letting other people take advantage of us so we can play the supporting role of a door mat in the story of their lives.  No, I’m talking taking the reigns of our own life and to give out of the overflow of our own lives to be an impactful positive influence in the lives of others which cannot happen until we go through the often painful process of self transformation from the inside out.  To look inside the deepest part of who we are and to deal with all the ugliness which only serves to decay us into numb self centered people is a good step in the right direction.

I don’t pretend to know the answers to anything.  All I know is the heart wants what the heart wants.  And I want my heart, and the hearts of my children, to choose what is good, lovely, true, and real and seek adventure on the road less traveled.  It’s a lifelong adventure with valley lows and mountain top highs.  But I wouldn’t have it any other way.


**My favorite line.

Alice offers a recipe for pumpkin chocolate chip pancakes after the essay.. if you want to view the page.. click here:


What I'm really all about are these:

I'm serious about my red curry. I'm even more serious about my red curry when it has clams...

Thank you Alice! I think I love you..


Friday, July 19, 2013

In four years ... My neck will be part of my cleavage. No one told me.. til now...

I'M NOT EVEN GONNA type some crap about why I haven't blogged in months..

I'm just f***ing busy.. busy being overwhelmed, with an eternally messy house and a kid who thinks he owns the laptop every time it opens. YouTube MUST magically appear. That's what you get for using YouTube to entertain your kids, you lazy f***s. Myself included.

* Side note: If you're poor like me and cannot afford babysitters.. you get a ..kind of sort of  pass. Afterall, YouTube is a close second. It's also a plus if you're not stealing the wi-fi from your neighbors.

Moving on...

You know you're losing it and throwing in the towel when you're kids are coloring the top of the toilet seat with crayons and you're like who gives a f***? I just need 30 more seconds to finish brushing my teeth.. as long as the lids closed.. it's FINE. Yeah.. fine. You wanna dump a whole bunch of Advil and Q-Tips into the bath tub? SUUURE! Go ahead. As long as it buys more silence.. I'm down.

I feel like like lately .. I'm throwing in the towel A LOT. And guess what? I DON'T CARE. 

Because.. I can't care. I have to choose between my sanity and a semi-clean house. My sanity and a schedule. My sanity and ...laundry? My sanity and a toilet seat cover free from black crayons?

Which is worse?
The fact that my apartment has a pink toilet seat or that it's colored on in black crayon?

I wanted to come to y blog to tell you that I'm reading a book by Nora Ephron.. Titled, "I Feel Bad About My Neck... And Other Thoughts On Being A Woman"..

Normally, these "thoughts on being a woman" books nauseate me.

A lot.

Not interested.

But something about the cover.. I'm a sucker for a good cover..So.. I picked it up and read a few sentences. I think this can apply to me.. I thought. Nice cover.. witty, funny, easy reading, about aging.. and since I just turned 39......

Ok.. to the point..

Nora Ephron writes that she went to a dermatologist about her aging neck.. only to find out that there's not much they can do for the aging, sagging neck. The dermatologist told her that the neck starts to go at age 43.. and there's not much that can be done to revive it to it's glory..

There's an excerpt that I think is good enough to share with you that I'm willing to retype it here and now.. even after two.. (ok, FOUR) glasses of wine.. That's serious effort, people.

"According to my dermatologist, the neck starts to go at forty-three, and that's that. You can put make-up on your face and concealer under your eyes and dye on your hair, you can shoot collagen and Botox and Restylane into your wrinkles and creases, but short of surgery, there's not a damn thing you can do about a neck. The neck is a dead giveaway. Our faces are lies and our necks are the truth. You have to cut open a redwood tree to see how old it is, but you wouldn't have to if it had a neck."

Holy Crap.

That shit was... SO TRUE.  Superficial.  Deep.  Shallow.  Real.

Yeah Real.

Real Shitty.

I have about four years left til it's all turtlenecks and scarves from here on out.

I need technology to catch up with vanity.

I also think I need vanity to catch up with my sweat pants and greasy hair .. but that might be a whole other topic.

So.. Our faces are lies.. and our necks are the truth.... Where does that leave the thighs?

Just wondering.

These are questions I might need answers to.

And Nora Ephron's dermatologist said I only have about four years to figure it out...


Monday, December 17, 2012

So, How Much Do Sumo Wrestlers Make Now?

My text conversation today at gym..

I feel the need to share this with you.


I think it might be funny.

Me: Specialness all around me here- once again

Me: Some Asian lady- omg annoying.. Doing some kind of free form body flailing exercises on a mat like 11 inches from me- I'm on a leg press machine

Me: WHY? Always

Me: I'm a reject attractor

Me: I cannot shake them

Gina: Why?

Gina: Enjoy the view

Me: Do you see why I need an iphone? Must capture this for proof and LOLS

Me: Proof that I work out because I'm so fat no one would believe it

Gina: Makes the time go by

Me: At this rate, I could switch careers and become a sumo wrestler

Me: I train all day with Shane

Me: How much do they make?

Me: Can I live 5 doors down from you in Robbinsville on a sumo wrestler's salary?

Me: These are questions I needs answers to

Me: Ohhh! Craptacular misfit aerobics class about to start!

Me: Land of the misfit toys..

Me: The only thing better than watching this is Zumba.. but it never starts until 7 pm and I'm already stuffing my face by then

Me: If they start playing Cher remixes, I get a pass to leave early

Me: Because my inner thighs will never look as bad as Cher sounds..

Me: Would you like to say something here?


Gina does talk.. I swear. Just not when I'm at the gym.. apparently.


Sunday, December 16, 2012

I'm Not Breaking Up With My Blog..

I'm here because I feel "weird" not coming here to post something.. after 30 days of our blog romance.. I feel like I am betraying a  I can't break up with my blog..


I also cannot be brilliant 365..  24/7.. at least not here.

I just wanted to stop in and say that I will be here.. I will be posting.

How can I not?

Because people won't stop wearing skinny jeans. And I need to follow the latest Snuggie trend..

And? I am a loudmouth.. who has the urge to say stuff.. to tell you things.. And? I'm using you for free therapy until I can find a qualified babysitter so I can actually leave this house.

Just kidding.

But- not really.

Good night Internets.



Saturday, December 15, 2012

Is Beef Jerky Like Pleather Made in China?


I was standing in line at Walmart the other day..I hadn't eaten in a few hours and I was starving.

Suddenly, the beef jerky hanging by the cashier line started to look appetizing.

Yeah, I know.
Normally, I don't touch stuff like this. I'm not even tempted or intrigued.
But this time? I don't know. I was hungry. The line was long. I was now-  intrigued?
So I decide to buy a pouch of this stuff. Something named Jack Link's or something like that?
I get to my car and open the package.
Looks like...leather? No- pleather, actually. Suddenly? I have flashbacks of shopping on Canal St. ..
I take a bite of it.. which was like- soft raw hide? I think I kind of like it because it's salty.. like teriyaki flavor or something.
Hmmmm. Dried beef. In a bag. Which tastes like a beef teriyaki shoe lace. But yet- still kind of good.
The whole time I'm chewing it, I'm realizing more and more what it is that I'm actually chewing..
Internal Dialogue:
"You're chewing a dead animal. A dead animal that was dried out like- in the sun or something. For DAYS.  A cow. You're chewing old dried out dead cow meat that was sealed in a bag for sale in the impulse buy area near the cashier at Walmart. You have reached a new low.."
But guess what?
I couldn't stop chewing.
Maybe it's this indoctrination we go through as children of eating meat- dead animals- that makes us so nonchalant about it. Because, you know, we don't see their heads. We don't see the dried meat SPLAYED out in the sun for days. We just eat it.
By the way, I know someone (whose name rhymes with Zena) who didn't know that shrimp have heads- with eyes. And that they get cut off (In this country, anyway) before they're sold to us.
Yes, I did. I have enlightened this friend. Or ruined her view of shrimp.. however you want to look at that. Shrimp are nothing like scallops. They were practically cast members of The Little Mermaid.. They have heads- with eyes. They have feelings. Shrimp need love too.
Where am I going with this?
I don't really know.
Just remembered.. really tired. Gotta go to bed.
The End.

Friday, December 14, 2012

Believing in Santa Claus is Awesome

Dear Internet Friends,

I am going out for dinner tonight.. to Wasabi in Somerville, NJ. It's a Japanese sushi-steakhouse type of place.

I'm not a sushi person.. I could care less about cold rolls of fish/vegetables with seaweed and.. whatever else.

I like my food hot, spicy.. and for the most part- cooked..

Gina (who at this point needs no introduction) is the sushi lover here. I'm going for the Miso Nabe Yaki Udon Noodle Soup- which has all types of greatness inside: shrimp, chicken, mushrooms, fishcakes, egg, fresh herbs, vegetables and thick yummy Japanese udon noodles! (Pictures to follow soon after)..

I say all that to say-- I have to get a post up here before I get home too late and too tipsy to do it!

I was looking through some old pictures yesterday.. I came across these gems.

These are some old pictures from the holidays when I was a kid.

They bring back good memories. I hold these sacred because sometimes? It feels like they were too few and far between.

Just wanted to share.

**I apologize to my Internet friends who don't know me "personally"- because  you probably won't give a crap about seeing these.

Just bear with us, ok?


Btw- do you want to see what Gina looks like? Of course you do!

She's hot- so we have been told.

FYI: All inquires can be answered via email..  Privately.   LOL..

This is Gina. AKA: Geda.
Loyal Blog Reader and Regularly Featured
Ok, now on to the oldies..
This is me, Duke and Debbie at the Livingston Mall in NJ- about 1981?
Me and my sister Debbie by the tree.
Uhmm, think that dress was a bit too small, Mom..
This is me- asking Santa Claus (My Uncle Stan?) for toys that.. I already got?
That is my uncle Lyndon in the far right corner..
This is my sister Debbie on the far left and me on the far right.
In the center is my mom's sister and my cousin Lisa in her lap.
This is me on the left and Debbie on the right.. On Uncle Stan's lap.
Look at my awesome shoes.  Uhhmm..
Fast forward to 2012.. Shane.. obsessed with the lights..
I know I have more around here somewhere.. I just couldn't find them..
I pre-wrote most of this before I left but didn't get it uploaded in time. I'm just now getting home and getting this up.
Miso Nabe Yake Udon Noodles? Awesome.
Mussells and Clams in spicy broth? Not so much.
Ok.. have to get in bed.. eyes closing..
Thanks for visiting.. see you tomorrow!

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Do You Do the Walk of Shame?

Today I put a dollar in the Salvation Army Pot.

You know- the one with the person who stands next to it, RINGING THAT GOD DAMNED BELL INCESSANTLY?

Yeah, that.

Well today I stopped and asked the man with the bell.. WHY?? Why and.. How?

Me: Sir, can I ask you some questions?

Sir: Yes..

Me: How do you get this gig? Why do you ring that bell constantly- do they make you do this? Is there a "training" you go through that tells you to ring this bell non-stop?

Sir: (In Broken English) I get this job each year only at Christmas. Me ride bike. Sleep only three hours (holds up four fingers) a night. Yes, I ring bell.

Me: Huh?

Sir: Yes. (Smiling big)..

Me: Sir, Do you have dreams at night that you're still ringing this bell?

Sir: (Laughing) NOooo..  hahahaa..

Me:  (Also laughing) Well, I am going to put this money in the pot so that means you should STOP ringing the bell. I'm actually PAYING YOU to stop ringing this bell. The only time a bell should ring incessantly after I put money inside something is when I've won something. This is not Atlantic City. We are outside of Walmart. I have not won anything.


I put the money into the pot and he started ringing his bell like a mad man, laughing and carrying on.

He was so endearing, I couldn't even be annoyed. I wanted to get his picture for the blog because as we were talking, I knew I was going to have to tell you about this.

But it just somehow didn't feel right to ask. So, I didn't.

So it remains a mystery- the reason behind the incessant bell ringing.

Although, I guess I could always Google it.. But I won't.

I will tell you that my personal feeling is this:

This bell?  It's like a siren of guilt as you walk by. Poor, lonely cold person ringing a bell, begging for help for the poor and disadvantaged. Are you really gonna walk right past me right now while I'm ringing this bell at 400 decibels in FRONT of all these people-  who might see you walk past me without giving some cash? Remember! We are The Salvation Army! The incessant bell ringers! Donate now or else be publicly shamed the whole time you walk back to your car...

If only the poor bell ringers had Snuggies...


Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Okay, Now? My Blog Is Stalking Me.

I have 3 more posts to go to meet my 30 posts in 30 days challenge.

It has not been easy. Some nights, I'd rather have my face in a quart of chicken lo mein with 12 kids dvd's on heavy rotation than sit here trying to be brilliant for the masses. LOL. For Gina. I kind of feel like my blog is stalking me at this point.

What will happen after December 15th? Will you still come back and read? Are you lurkers ever gonna start making comments to let me know I need to keep coming back because you started looking forward to all the things I have to say?

On another note--

I am having a medical test tomorrow morning and so all day I have had do some fast that only allows me to eat plain chicken, eggs, white bread, white rice, potatoes, black coffee and water.

NOT allowed are dairy, vegetables, butter, seasonings, pasta, ALCOHOL...anything good.

I just ate my last meal which consisted of some eggs and a slice of bread with air spread on top.


Tomorrow this crap will be over with and I will march directly to the bagel shop and devour a bagel breakfast sandwich laden with hot sauce.. like putting salve on a wound..

Maybe this starvation I am experiencing has led my brain to dry up- hence, shitty blog post.

The fun police arrived and took my glory. Just for today. I swear tomorrow I'm gonna be back to my brilliant self.

And btw, did I tell you that the scale at the gym is broken? Yeah, it is because it says I weigh 150 lbs.. and like.. I just can't see how that happened.

I'm totally ok with it though because I do enjoy living in denial. It's what gets me from point A to point B most days. Denial can be your friend- if you let it.


I finally shaved my legs today so tomorrows weigh in will be like... 149!


See you tomorrow.. I hope.


Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Gangnum Style. Sort of.

This is Shane dancing Gangnum Style.. his version.
Uhmm.. he left his chopsticks in the kitchen. And his napkin.
You need a little volume for these..

Click here for the adult version.. in case you don't know by now what Gangnum Style is..

I kind of wish I didn't.


Monday, December 10, 2012

I Have Ginsu Knives. There, I Admitted It.

Tonight I made these for dinner..

Spicy Asian Beef Kebabs
These are my own creation- sort of. Recipe to follow.
 I am under the gun to get this post up.. it's 11:28 pm.. my kid is NOT asleep and I'm still wiping crusty things off of the table and floor from his "wipe crusty things all over the house- all day" gig.
I had to reach into the back of my drawer for a new knife and I pulled this out:

A GINSU Knife!
Do you remember the Ginsu commercials? OMG. This knife must have been purchased via tv infomercial. I think I remember doing it.. if I'm honest.
This knife? Is about 20 years old- NO LIE.
I have never sharpened it. EVER.
I have to show you the commercial. Some one will have it on you tube..
This is IT. This is my knife.  1992.. I was right.
How many of you remember this?
It was $29.95 back then.. Somehow, I'm thinking it would be cheaper now.
Also? I looked in my drawer and found the steak knives that go with this set. Even worse.
Do you think I can get these on the Antiques Roadshow?
Btw- If you want to make these Spicy Asian Beef Kebabs- Here's how I do it:
Marinate cubed beef in this (below) for 2 to 4 hours. I don't do overnight marinades when I marinate with soy sauce or vinegar because I find it breaks down the meat too much and it becomes mushy.
* Also- the secret here is to use RIBEYE STEAK.
Yeah, it's expensive. But it's SO WORTH IT.
5 tablespoons of grated FRESH ginger
4 tablespoons of toasted sesame oil (don't leave this out!)
4 or more tablespoons of Sriracha hot sauce
teaspoon or more of red chili flakes
1/2 cup of soy sauce
2 diced scallions
2 tablespoons of brown sugar or honey
4 tablespoons of rice wine vinegar (or white vinegar if that's all you have)
2 tablespoons of garlic powder (you can use fresh but the powdered works fine here)
handful of chopped cilantro
I also make some skewers of red onions and mushrooms.
I put the steak onto some skewers and just sear it on all sides on my grill pan.. or you can do it outdoors if you gave a grill.
I serve it with white rice.
I did the onions and mushrooms in the wok this time.. Just stir fried them in the marinade for a bit..